The importance of teaching our children to be independent

The importance of teaching our children to be independent

As parents it’s tempting to do everything for our children and often WANT to do it, as well as it being easier and faster! Teaching them independence from an early age has the most impact to build a child’s self-esteem and confidence.
 
A child’s brain starts developing from day one and by acknowledging that they’re capable of doing things for themselves, we as parents can have a positive impact on their overall development, understanding of the world, self-confidence, as well as emotional maturity. When a child feels empowered, they want to do more.

Children learn by watching those around them and model their parents.    

For example, when a child starts to feed themselves, it not only helps with sensory development, and meal times become a social event. They might start by eating with their fingers and progress to cutlery once their skills develop over time. We might need to deal with a ‘mess’ and should welcome this as it is about the experiences for the child.
For children there is no right or wrong way to eat. Eating with the fingers is the best way to start. www.babyledweaning.com

So what small changes can we make every day to nurture independence?  

Set realistic targets. Allow the child to go through the process over and over to make the experience a learning curve and fun.  Enjoy the time with your child and bestow a lot of praise. Adding pressure builds up stress for parents and children.
 
Very early on we should be encouraging children to eat by themselves, wash their hands and sit at a table with their parents for mealtime with the family. There are some activities that children can help with too, such as packing toys away and pushing a baby shopping trolley. As children get older, their independence grows along with their self-confidence, therefor they will want to participate and contribute more.                                                                                           

We should encourage this from little things like, throwing their bib in the laundry basket, fetching shoes when it’s time to leave the house, putting their shoes on by themselves, wiping their face with a wash cloth and happily playing alone.
 
We can stimulate the children by singing together as we clean up (sing ‘Clean up, clean up, everybody do your share’) and appreciate these moments with your child. Give them your full attention and focus. Take a break from your phone and your laptop.  It might take a little time - a child learns to talk by being spoken to, by experiencing and articulating sounds / words and then one day a sentence will form.
 
As our children navigate their way through life, learning right from wrong, forming opinions and personalities, the independence they acquire from an early age can put them in great stead for taking on challenges with confidence. Support your child, by encouraging them to help themselves.

The “W” sitting position

Lying, rolling, sitting-up, crawling; infants go through a host of developmental stages before they develop the coordination, muscle tone and strength to finally walk. Each motor stage milestone emerges once the previous is matured and mastered.

Over the years, we have seen children with various levels of coordination, gait, posture and balance. It is not uncommon to see children sitting in the “W” position: when a child sits with their knees bent and tucked under them in a ‘W” configuration. However, from a physiological and developmental perspective, it is something that we should be aware of.

Children often prefer to sit in this way because it creates a wider support basis and greater stability of the hips and torso. This helps seated children balance better when playing, reaching out or moving. So what is the problem, then? Actually the issue with “W sitting” is that it decreases the need for “trunk control”; the ability children have to shift their weight and ultimately impairs “trunk rotation”. Trunk rotation is vital for stretching movements when reaching to grasp or catch objects with one or both hands, for actions that require balance such as skipping, as well as midline crossing crossing arms from one side to another. Midline crossing is necessary for developing hand preference/dominance necessary for advanced level skills such as handwriting and reading.

Habitually sitting in the “W” position may also impact the way muscles of the hips and legs develop (shortening and tightening); often leading to children who are pigeon-toed or walk on their toes.

As educators, it is important to take note of children who prefer to sit in this potion as it may be the tell-tale sign of other underlying issues; children with hyper-mobility of the joints and sensory processing disorder. It may also indicate the retention of developmental reflexes such as the Symmetrical Tonic Neck Reflex (STNR) - a transitional reflex which helps children move on from the stage of lying on the floor to crawling or the tonic labyrinthine reflex related to balance, muscle tone and proprioception. Reflexes such as these which remain unintegrated may manifest in later childhood as poor posture, poor muscle tone, difficulty in sitting still, challenges with reading and writing, poor hand/eye coordination, focusing on a task and vision disorders.

Naturally, it is easier to correct the “W” sitting position before it becomes habitual. Together, parents and school should be aware of it and encourage children to sit in alternate positions: side sitting, long sitting or cross-legged sitting.

The role of nursery should be so much more than just a play area to socialise. Good nurseries in Dubai will have teachers with an experienced and sensitive eye who will be able to pick up and communicate physical nuances that need to be addressed consistently so that nursery and the home environment can create a strong support network. For more information regarding unintegrated reflexes please refer to Kinesiology Dubai's Website or alternatively contact the office.

kinesiologydubai.com